They’ll Talk Anyway – Here’s Why You Shouldn’t Care

Ask one person about me and you’ll hear how funny, sweet, strong and talented I am. Ask another and you’ll hear what a bitch, whore, and loser I am.

I am a hero to some and a villain to others.

And the very moment I stopped focusing on which, my life changed.

I stopped lighting myself on fire to keep everybody else warm.

I stopped trying to pretend I am stronger than I am.

I stopped comparing myself to others.

I started working on forgiving myself for my weaknesses and mistakes.

I excused myself from the company of people who will never like or respect me. No drama. No tantrum or showdown. Just… poof! I stopped letting them get to me and eventually they stoped trying.

It’s been magical.

I went skydiving for the first time at age 51!

I got my first drum set as a gift for my 52 nd birthday and I can now (almost) play two different beats. lol. It is so much fun even though I am currently pretty awful at it!

I am writing a screenplay based on my second book, How to Woo a Widow, and I am on a quest to see it played out as the next great chick flick!

I just spent 10 minutes trying to figure out how to put the word “so” in italics in that last sentence now that Beehiv changed its formatting process, and you can see that I did not succeed.

Onward!

Why am I telling you this when I am supposed to be making this all about you, you ask?

(Again with the italics challenge- maybe I’ll have it figure out by next week )

Because, Silly- It is about you! If I can make such extraordinary changes in my health, happiness, and career path simply by letting go of the lie that it is my responsibilty to manage other people’s feeling and opinions about me - so can you.

Try it and you’ll experience the difference too. Your professional path will become stronger as you focus on being the best at what you do because you love doing it and you stopped needing outside validation. That very energy and quality of your work will attract more success and more doors for you to open.

Your stress level will decrease. You will feel less fatigued. You will have more energy for doing the things you love with the people you love- and who love you back. You will take better care of yourself.

Your friendships will change. As you cull the herd, new stars in your inner circle will emerge. Champions who inspire you. And you will rise to new levels in your sincere intent to champion them right back.

I have such success with this that I began sharing my process with others. I knew for sure I was on to something when I taught my Power of Proximity technique to a small group of highly successful entreprenuers- the kind with more zeros in their bank than me, who speak on more stages, and who once upon a time I would have been terrified of- and they all ate it up. One even asked me for permission to teach it to his clients!

I dedicated an entire chapter to this technique in my third book, What Not to Wear to a Murder Trial (and other tips tragedy taught me)

I didn’t write that book because I need validation. Quite the opposite really. I knew that everything from the cover to the content would have my Haters hating. But I stopped caring.

I wrote it because I believe deeply in everything and everyone in it. I believe in the feedback I get from people telling me how it has helped them or someone they love.

We are about to embark on a new year. But you don’t have to wait for that New Year’s Eve party to start changing your life. Commit to that today.

Because who cares if people laugh? They will talk and laugh anyway. I’d rather be happy and have Haters hating, than live an unfulfilled life while they hate… wouldn’t you? (I figured out the new format!)